This piece on The Sword blog (NSFW) caught my attention. It’s discussing the forthcoming Palm Springs US ‘White Party’, a big annual LGBT circuit party. There’s a wonderful section in which the blogger writes:
Also, bring some Visine and however much outrage at your lack of civil rights you can muster while coming down off ecstasy because Adam Bouska will be doing one of his NOH8 photo shoots in a hotel, which is perfect for those faggots who like to honor marriage equality and have promiscuous, demoralizing sex all in one weekend. Which photo will be your Facebook profile pic come the Monday after? The one of you with the masking tape over your mouth in a hotel room or the one of you at the NOH8 photo shoot?’
It’s partly written in jest but it’s also wonderful accurate (although I’d dispute that promiscuous sex is always ‘demoralizing’). The blogger’s position is essentially the very argument I’m putting forward in some forthcoming work, that gay men increasingly project one life to the heterosexual world – a new (homo)normative conformity – yet it is de-sexed from their lived (homo)sexuality. Put simply, we’re happy to talk to co-workers on a Monday about our weekend out in gay clubs, and with our same-sex partner, but less likely to disclose a weekend of slutty anonymous sex. As an idea, this isn’t new but I argue that legal reform increasingly focuses upon establishing the new (homo)normative as ‘respectable’, and in doing so, de-sexing the homosexual. For many non theorists, it simply amounts to mass hypocrisy.